Insecurity Sets In

One of the three most inevitable things in life is getting old. I am afraid of getting old so I made an oath to look young and feel young even if I reach the golden ages. But lately, insecurity sets in. We grow old, have families, lose strength... Who will be there for us during those times?
Last night, it hit me: there are only three of us in the circle left who enjoy each other's company most of the time. Most of our friends already has children, families, and partners (some don't.) And when I looked at who I was with (Gabby and Taylor,) they both have partners of their own.
Whom will I be left with?
I have loved and hurt and been loved. The last being someone I do not really love, and the first two being someone I loved (NOTE: PAST TENSE.) But can't it be that there is someone out there that I truly love, and can love me back, and can be faithful to me?
Spare me your questions about me being positive these days.. But this just hit me like a mallet that hurled 50 feet away from me and smacked right into my face big time. Don't we all deserve someone we can be with for the rest of our lives?
I used to say that I can do things alone, I can live alone, and that I do not need love to exist. But I guess Maslow is right: It's part of our necessities. I know when to stand up alone and but I know that there are times that I need someone to lean on.
I am content with my friends. But I need someone whom I can share my life with totally, who can make me feel that I'm a priority, who can be there for me all the time, who can give me that feeling that I am the only one.
Nah! Screw this. I guess there will never be a time for that. I'll die alone but I'll die with honor and greatness. I'm not going to let another cocksucker knock me off my feet only to realize that I'm part of a threesome (or foursome, or more?)
In the mean time, I'd have to enjoy me being THE ONLY ONE for myself...
Then again, comes that feeling again....